What a difference a year makes...

This picture was taken around a year ago and Matthew was still at MBHOH.

Matthew at Maria's Big House of Hope, spring 2012

 

This time last year we were knee deep in paperwork and in the process of our home study.  However, we were excited to be working in a forward direction to find our son. A son that God had placed in our hearts and spurred us to find and bring home. This time last year, we had started to let our family and friends know about our plans to adopt, some embraced the idea with us and some thought we were a little crazy. Back then we had so many worries - would we able to afford the adoption, going to a country half way around the world, flying home with a toddler, will we be able to handle a child with "special needs", were we going to disrupt our lives too much adding a little one to the mix, and having enough love and time for a third child without short changing Shelby and Robbie. 

Can I tell you that God takes care of all the details when it's something close to his heart.

Matthew at home, spring 2013

- When we started the adoption process, we applied for grants and didn't get any. A dear dear friend and her family offered to tithe 10% from the salary from her contracted position and wrote us a check each month during that time. It was a blessing to have someone believe in us that much and often her check was the amount we were "missing" to a tee.  Sweet relatives sent a check at Christmas that ended up covering a car repair that occurred a few days after the check was given. Things just seemed to be provided for all this past year. The day after we picked up Matthew, we received an email in China letting us know of some unexpected money - it covered all of our remaining expenses.   The person sending the email had no idea of our expenses.  We cannot take the credit for any of this, it was all by God's provision.

- Foreign travel, that was an easy one. Now, I feel like I could go just about anywhere.   Flying home with a toddler - not pretty, but accomplished!

- Special needs... Who doesn't have a special need? It all boiled down to, if Shelby or Robbie had (insert special need), wouldn't we do everything humanly possible without a thought? However, I will be freaking out when Matthew is in the hospital and surgery scares me to death.  I worry how others will treat Matthew at school, will they see him different? Scars? What is worse to think about is how all things would be for Matthew if he didn't have a family through all of it - that would be the scary part. 

- Yes our life is disrupted!! Guess what? He's just what we needed and truly he blesses us more than we could ever do for him. So often we are self centered and selfish with our time. What an interruption to have someone come kiss your cheek and hug your leg. Who thinks the world of you for just being there. I love getting to see the world through the eyes of someone who is experiencing just about everything for the first time.  

-Short changing Shel and Ro? Yes there is less time to go around, but what do we hear from them all the time since bringing Matthew home???  Another little brother or sister would be nice!  Their hearts have been opened to little ones and they get to see first hand how love grows when there isn't even any biological reason to. They already know at a young age the importance of protecting the fatherless and hopefully will adopt someday themselves.   It seems a little crazy to think about with college and surgeries looming and it did take us 17 years the first time around. So the idea is definitely tucked into our heart, we'll just have to wait and see what God has planned for us.

Oh what a difference a year makes!

Happy 4 month Gotcha Day!

 

Love my little Chinese American! Am I ever excited to see the good plans that God has for this little one! 

 

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

- Jeremiah 29:11-13

Busy spring

Czech Republic - Heritage Day

Sorry it's been so long since I posted! Jeff has been super busy at work, so not a a lot of down time for me to blog. This time of year is just plain busy anyway. Shelby is counting down the days till she becomes a senior, so excited for her, but a I am a little sad this time is already knocking on our door. Marching band season starts early this year, so thankfully August won't be so chocked full. Robbie is counting his last days of elementary school, too. Seems like they work in a dozen important things for him at school before the year ends - kickball playoffs (his class won the fifth grade championship!) Heritage day, Dare graduation, and a band concert to name a few.



Kickball!

Robbie's teacher and coach

winning team

Matthew with the "almost senior" Shelby

 

Matthew is really just blossoming. I can't imagine life without him. Life defiantly moves at a different pace for me now that he is here, but my new normal is starting to feel ... well normal. More words are slowly coming and we said goodbye to bottles last month, too. He is climbing stairs really well and he still enjoys helping me with EVERYTHING. He loves playing in the sink, playing legos and having books read to him. 

 

 

 

 

We took our first camping trip of the season and Matthews first camping ever. It went really well. He loved toasted marshmallows and he maintained a safe distance from the fire on our tiny campsite. There wasn't much shade there, so Matthew wanted to get up with the sun on the first morning. He isn't one to ever want to miss anything. I got smart the second night and covered all the windows in fleece blankets! The campground we stayed was in amish country. We visited the local sites, bought some cheese, and just hung out. It was really cool to see the amish plowing the fields just out our back window.

 

However, the past few weeks have been  bittersweet. First, we received great news that one of the families in our adoption group is already gearing up to go back to China to adopt another child. Their sweet daughter Emmie is the same age as Matthew and they are adding a son the same age. Makes my heart just soar to know that another little one is going to have a whole new life in a fabulous family. However the very next day, we received news that a little girl who had a serious heart condition in our adoption group, passed away. Words can't do justice to how heartbreaking this is. I know this sweet girl is in the arms of the angels and she passed away as a precious daughter in a family to call her very own.

First American Haircut - Before, During and After

MRI results

Got little man's MRI results today. Looks like his malformation is both venous and lymphatic in nature. The malformation is in one area only, but consists of several cysts. The best news - the cysts are laying just under the skin and right on top the muscles of his face. Sclerotherapy is no longer an option, surgery to remove it is the way to go. There will be one big surgery in the near future, with some follow up revision surgeries to follow to remove excess skin and adjust his nose sagging. The surgeon we saw felt the least scaring option would be to have the incision go along the side of the face near his ear, but there is a good chance the incision would run along side of his nose and into his smile line around his mouth. Matthew will be joining the other "tough customer" males in our family who have visited the plastic surgeon and now have facial scars- Jeff's is from skin cancer and Robbie has his "Harry potter" scar across his forehead from running into a very sharp chair rail & a chin scar from falling on a chair. Matthew will be in good company!

We will be looking into a second opinion, but so far we really love the surgeon we have worked with. It would be great to stay local if we could. Prayers would be appreciated for guidance through this process.

Home 2 months

Matthew has been home over 2 months now.  What a kid!  He had his first pictures taken and was very cooperative!!!   I brought the Shelby and Robbie along for entertainment reinforcements and even threw on some extra deodorant in case I would have to wrestle him into the next outfit or have to stand on my head to get him to smile. Perfect little smiling gentleman decided to show up instead. 

 

It is a lot of fun to see more and more of his personality coming out.  Most days he is a sweet boy.  Then he likes to spice things up around here and keep his momma a hoppin.  As with any two year old, "no" has become a staple of his vocabulary, even if what he really means is yes.  Matthew wants to be held a lot and prefers to be my shadow everywhere I go - bathroom, laundry...  I think so many things are new to him and wants to make sure he doesn't miss a thing.  It's still pretty exciting to put laundry in the dryer and flush toilet paper in the toilet.

  I have seen some days where he tests his boundaries and my trust. He will get mad and push me away. Tantrums erupt... Then when he calms down and he sees his mama is still willing to hold him after all the hard stuff, you would think I couldn't hold him enough.  Occasionally he will still call out in the middle of the night, I will go and pick him up and he will be clutching me trying give me the tightest biggest hug.  I will give him some more hugs and kisses and just lay him back down.   He seems pretty content and relieved that yes mama is still here. 

Matthew is starting to play by himself occasionally.  Who knew how much fun a can of play dough and a plastic knife could be?? He loves to wheel his grocery cart through the house "shopping" - if you have lost something, it's probably in the cart.  Rain boots and puddles are #1, too.  Matthew loves to pray - he frequently stops our meal (sometimes 4-5 times), folds his hands and grunts for the rest of us to follow.  Imaginary food is still pretty yummy to "eat". 

It is such a funny place where I am as a mom - college visits, play dough and deprived sleep.  I would have thought by kid #3 I knew it all - wow am I ever amazed how much I still don't.   Even though he is just two, he certainly comes with a past that didn't have a  momma and daddy meeting all his needs.  So some days are HARD, but adoption is crazy joyful and beautiful, too.   To have the privilege to be called his parents see this awesome little person emerge, makes my heart burst.  The four of us can't seem to get enough of his sweet little hugs and kisses. If one of us has been away, we all rush to find Matthew in the house when we get home.   How amazing for an orphan from a whole other continent to fit right into his new family half way around the world just like he was always supposed to be here. Isn't God cool!     

 

 

 

Happy 10th Anniversary Show Hope!

MRI

I am sitting in the radiology waiting room while Matthew gets his MRI done. Only one parent is allowed back in the radiology suite. Jeff is back with him and I know Matthew is completely fine, but boy is this difficult not being back there. I am usually the one who gets to do most the procedures, appointments and night time wake ups with the kids, hard for me not being there to comfort him.I know this is only the beginning of a lot of medical stuff and this is probably the least of anything Matthew will have to go through, still tough.